Well, it seems ‘ol Johnny is single-handedly wrecking the Republican Party. Sorry to kick things off with such a gloomy lead, but over the last several weeks it’s become rather obvious that Mr. “Nice Guy” isn’t the lovable chap he pretends to be. In fact, he’s quite the annoying and insufferable charlatan. You know, normally when a candidate for president of the United States has no mathematical chance of winning the nomination, he does the right thing and drops out of the race. But, not Johnny. Nope. The self-proclaimed "Prince of Light and Hope" is in it for the long haul — declaring war on the "Disciples of Darkness" wherever they might lurk. (Mordor, maybe?) And, in doing so, he could wind up handing the nomination to Donald Trump on a silver platter.
To be clear: I don’t have anything against the fact that the guy embarked on a presidential campaign. I get it. Becoming the Leader of the Free World is quite the enticing proposition, especially for the son of a mailman. (I figured I’d remind everyone of that since it hasn’t come up in the last five minutes.) What I do have a problem with, however, is that he’s still in the race, vying for a brokered convention like the pompous nitwit that he is. Much like Ben Carson’s over-extended campaign, Kasich’s has become nothing more than an egomaniacal vanity project — one that is completely disregarding the will of the people and undermining Republican voters across the country. It’s astonishingly hypocritical, really. The same guy claiming that he cares about the American people obviously doesn’t care about what they want. Every poll points to Donald Trump or Ted Cruz clinching the nomination and, with Trump’s ever-increasing un-favorability rating, it seems that Cruz will likely win in the end. Either way, the people have spoken. Some of them want an adulterating-liberal-progressive-billionaire who’s masquerading as a Republican. And some of them want a principled, true conservative. But they don’t want Johnny. If you’re one of Kasich’s four fans, I’d suggest that you reconsider supporting him. He honestly has no business even being in the race. The only thing he’ll accomplish is splitting the anti-Trump vote, which will undoubtedly give Trump the nomination — ironic considering that he markets himself as an anti-Trump guy.
Part of me has to wonder if Johnny is just horribly dense and oblivious, truly believing he can somehow become President of the United States. (Quick reminder: he’s only won, like, one state.) Or, on the other hand, perhaps he’s a conniving and devious phony. Maybe it’s a combination of both. I don’t know. All I do know is that he’s essentially evading the entire history and point of the American electoral system and screwing conservative voters in the process. Even worse, he apparently doesn’t care.
If this is some sort of strategy on Kasich’s part, he must be taking his campaign advice from a Magic 8 ball instead of an experienced advisor. That’s really the only other explanation I can think of for why this fool would remain in the race as he continues to hemorrhage money and sink even lower in the polls. Frankly, he should have dropped out after Iowa. There has been absolutely no reason up to this point for him to continue campaigning. I give him credit for trying, but now he’s just making himself — and the Republican Party — look like a joke. That’s really the last thing we need while attempting to bring Independents and moderates over to our side. For God’s sake, we’ve already got Donald Trump parading around on national television like a bombastic drama queen, acting like an absolute buffoonish clown every day. He makes fun of the mentally-handicapped, insults war veterans, runs elderly widows off their property to erect his casinos, refers to women as dogs and fat slobs and openly says he would date his own daughter.
Do we really need a silly candidate who insists on remaining in the race when he doesn’t even stand a chance? I think not.
To put all of this in perspective, think about it like this: Kasich is the boneheaded, overly flirtatious high school jock trying to woo the cutest girl in his grade level (that’s America, by the way.) But, this girl wants nothing to do with him and he’s such an obtuse dolt that he just can’t take a hint. So he continues to pursue her, despite her resistance. Eventually, she’ll have to say it to his face. And that’s what the American people need to do with John Kasich. Send a loud and clear message across every possible platform that we don’t want him. We don’t care what he has to say. We don’t care that he won Ohio. We don’t care that he’s the son of mailman.
We. Don’t. Care.
It makes sense for Johnny to drop out. But, if there’s one thing I’ve learned from this election cycle, there’s very little that makes sense these days.
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